How Toxic Thinking Affects Your Energy


There are certain moments in your life when you have to check-in and ask yourself why you are drawing such crappy energy, and when exactly did you get yourself in this current position.

When you think about it, energy is all around you; in every person and in every room. It’s something that you can’t get away from. It’s like a life force, that determines how you feel day-to-day-happy or sad, powerful, or downtrodden.

Luckily for you, if you’re experiencing darkness in your life, you can always change the channel. As you know, everyone gives off their own energy when you’re near them, and you pick up on these energetic frequencies on a subliminal, subconscious level. Ironically many of these energies are from people using the same frequencies. So if you’re picking up people’s negative vibrations, chances are you’re attracting it to you.

“It’s like they drain the life out of you,” said Angela, business consultant. I met her at a coffee shop to discuss her recent breakup. “He was selfish in so many ways, and I can’t believe I was in love with him. We were together for a year, and he never introduced me to his family or friends. I knew something was wrong, and even tried to break it off but he kept coming back. I slept over his house most nights, and we were spending a lot of time together, so I knew he wasn’t cheating.  But trust me, there were a lot of neon warning signs that I ignored. He had a wandering eye as if he was always looking for an alternative. And he could be so charming one minute but emotionally removed the next. For example, he talked about himself excessively, and there was never any room for compromise. I was ready for a committed relationship, and he was looking for a mother.

Our relationship was like the movie with Carrie Bradshaw and Mr. Big, except no one ended up getting married. We had many of the same interest: food, music and culture. I liked being with him because he was intelligent, and he showed me new things, and vice versa. In retrospect, I was with someone that was emotionally unavailable and was just there to suck me dry.” 

                                                                                                      –Suze. M,  27.

Positive people are drawn to positive energy; negative people are drawn to negative energy. Just like the old adage: like attracts like. But what do you do when you’re constantly attracting negativity in your life? Could you be unaware of your own negativity? And if so, how can you change your vibrations?

Scientists Dr. Joe Dispenza reveals that positive thinking is much more than just being happy and having a positive attitude. Positive thoughts create real value in your life and help shape your reality, heal you from within, and build incredible skills that will propel you towards your bigger goals.


Be transformed by your mind

Here’s what I learned: The conscious mind is your awareness of your surroundings, and the physical sensations in your body, whether or not you’re hungry, and so on. However it only controls 10% of the mind. Your subconscious mind holds 90% of power over your mind and it directs you, without your awareness. It can even direct the course of what you do in your life.

Because of this we must learn to chose our thoughts wisely. A good book to read on this is, “Are you the Placebo” by Joe Dispenza. He explains that the conscious mind is logical and has no memory or emotions. It has no likes or dislikes. However, the subconscious has imagination, emotion, memory. So if you plant a bad idea or rather, we think of an idea; a seed is now planted in the subconscious mind. Negative thoughts lead to negative belief systems about who you are. In life everyone is out to program you in some way or another unless you learn to program your own thoughts. A good way to do this is to alway be in the state of, “love, peace, gratitude, abundance and happiness. Because if you don’t, you will always attract toxic situations and people into your life by what you’re transmitting. It can literally, make you feel dark and gloom, emotionally reactive, and defensive–while seeing the world through a filter of anger, and paranoia.


Work on your thoughts

Since your mind and body are deeply intertwined, your mental negativity has a physical counterpart. You may experience high blood pressure, anxiety and depression, and mood swings because of how you’re channeling your thoughts. A great way to talk with your subconscious mind is through inner conversations. This is a great way to have conversations between your conscious awareness and your subconscious awareness.

Here is an example:

{Before you go to bed at night, get a journal and write down some questions you have for yourself. When you wake up the next morning see if you can recall any dreams or any thoughts or feelings (which happens often with me). The point of this exercise is to get to know who you are and understand that every thought, memory, perception, emotion, all the experience you are engaged in throughout your waking life is hovered by the subconscious mind.}

So what happens when you let your mind go unchecked? Well, you start enduring negative situations day in, day out for a prolonged period of time in which your body’s energy is drawing to itself. Some more symptoms of negative energy are: low-self-esteem, doubt, fear, stress, anger, laziness, lack of creativity, indecisiveness, and jealousy.


How to reverse the toxic talk?

Several years ago, I went through a difficult trial. The emotional toll of having to deal with a loss contributed to a never-ending well of mood swings, blame, and pain. I felt like a victim and I couldn’t get out of my own way. I knew I had negative energy, but I didn’t know how to get rid of it.

In cases like this, getting back to a peaceful state of consciousness, can be quite a journey, and sometimes it may feel like a battle. However, there are many techniques that you can do yourself, to help break through it, such as: praying, meditation, journaling, laughter, and gratitude.


See yourself being, doing, having the life that you want

When you constantly feel bad about your life, you’re not living up to your fullest potential. Do not be conformed to life but be transformed by it. Transformed, means that you’re always moving and growing towards your goals. Many times people are not happy because they’re not working on themselves and if you’re not working on yourself, you’re not growing. Instead of concentrating on what other people want, find out what makes you happy, i.e what are your talents then learn to utilize them positively. 

When your emotions are out of control and you’re constantly dealing with discouraging thoughts, it’s time to do some mental cleaning.

One thing that I find considerably helpful is when I’m feeling any of those emotions because let’s face it no one is perfect, I will confront the energy/spirit immediately. I will tell myself that I was not born with the spirit of fear, hatred, anxiety, and tell my brain that it does not belong to me. Depending on how long you’ve been dealing with these negative energies you may have to confront it several times before it leaves you completely. And remember your brain is a sponge and it’s constantly picking up things that don’t belong to it. So it’s not enough to just work on your outer appearance, career, and relationships; you have to keep your mind in constant upkeep.


Constantly seek answers

Life is hard but walking around blaming people for your problems is keeping you stuck. If you have a problem; find the answer to that problem by establishing within yourself a: peaceful, joyful, praiseful, thankful state of consciousness as the answer will be added unto you. Learn to live in an answer state of consciousness. Another practice you can do before you go to bed is to release the negative energy and ask “The God in you” to go ahead of you and handle the situation, then wait. It’s not necessary to fight every battle; pick and choose what you get involved in and let life take its natural course. And if you find yourself going through a constant state of worry, doubt, and frustration, then it’s time to change your thinking—entirely. In your heart, begin to speak and feel: thankful, confident, and positive, regardless of what it may look like on the outside. If you can stay in this state, the answers will automatically begin to happen in your life. And the more you master this state of mind your problems will tend to work themselves out.


Be thankful for everything you have

 Appreciate life and try to show small gestures of love and care to friends, family, and people you don’t know. When you see someone walking, silently give them a salutation. And if you see someone with something that you want; say something kind and then say to yourself I can have great things too. Know that it’s your thoughts, and your feelings, your words of love and blessing that go before you each day. Start your day in mindfulness, creativity, and peacefulness. And if these things are taken from you, it’s because he/she thinks and feels subconsciously, they should be taken. Remember, you are the one in control of your mind, so don’t allow people to steal your joy. Even if you find your circumstance uncomfortable, don’t agree with the toxic energy in it: be, do, have, and believe your way out of it.

In the meantime, please know that you are worthy of a healthy and joyful life. It’s Ok if you make a mistake here and there; you’re still human. Getting rid of toxic energy is possible, and forming positive relationships is possible, too. Remember you are perfect and complete and everything you want is in your reach!


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